You Can Do
A Back-to-School Survival Guide for
Parents of Kids with Special Needs
By Erica Rimlinger
Teaching kids
with special needs is
not just a vocation. It is a specialized skill, and
for some, it’s even a calling. When COVID-
19 shuttered schools this spring, parents of
kids with special needs found themselves,
overnight, forced to assume the role of special
educator, all while parenting, quarantining
and, in some cases, simultaneously performing
other jobs.

Now, with public schools in the D.C. area
announcing a virtual start this fall, parents
face this news with hard-won insight into
the strategy, energy, time and skill required
to help kids with special needs learn at home.

Speaking for myself, I can only say (with a
hint of desperation creeping into my voice),
“I am not equal to the task.” Or, as I have read
on social media in countless posts in countless
variations, “HELP! I can’t do this again!”
Washington FAMILY consulted the experts
to find answers and, hopefully, provide a bit of
reassurance as you and your child begin a new
school year of virtual learning.

Your Child’s Rights
Education attorney Alexandra Rosenblatt,
whose second-grade daughter has Down
syndrome, wants to remind parents that a
child has the same educational rights at the
kitchen table as they do in the classroom.

“While almost all children struggle with
virtual learning, the struggle for children with
disabilities is significantly greater,” Rosenblatt
says. “I see a lot of parents hesitant to request
more support, services and modifications to
meet their child’s needs. Some parents worry
about being a ‘problem parent.’ Some parents
simply don’t know they have the right to ask
for more support and services,” she says.

What happened when schools closed in
the spring “isn’t going to cut it” this fall,
Rosenblatt says. She advises parents take time
to “identify what didn’t work.” For example:
“If the recorded videos did not work for your
child, then advocate for more live instruction.

If whole class or small group virtual learning
didn’t work for your child, then advocate for
more one-to-one instruction,” she says. “If
the work presented was not modified the
way it should have been, ensure the school
is modifying the workload and worksheets
based on how your child learns best.”
Schools must, Rosenblatt emphasizes,
“follow what is in the IEP. If you don’t agree
with what’s in the IEP, schools have to hold an
IEP meeting.”
30 Washington FAMILY SEPTEMBER 2020
Your IEP
What’s in the IEP anyway? Annie McLaughlin,
a board-certified behavior analyst and parent,
advises parents to find out—in great detail.

“Spend time reviewing your child’s IEP and
try to understand what your child knows and
doesn’t know,” she says.

McLaughlin, who works with parents to
translate and construct better IEPs, encour-
ages parents to ask educators questions such
as, “What are these goals based on? How did
you choose that number? How are you mea-
suring progress? What supports are used in
the classroom? Can I make that happen at
home? How?”
McLaughlin also encourages parents to seek
definitions for terms such as “grade-level pho-
nics” that would be unfamiliar to a layperson.

“Go to the common core website. Email teach-
ers,” McLaughlin says. “Get examples. Ask the
teacher, ‘Can you take a video of yourself doing
that skill?’ Ask them to train you.”
Rosenblatt agrees that parents should be
as informed as they can and keep detailed
records. “Keep an electronic or physical
COVID notebook,” she advises. “Make notes
each day about how successful learning
was, whether the work and instruction were



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appropriate for your child, what behavioral
and academic challenges your child experi-
enced that day, and your own observations
about what skills your child is losing or gain-
ing. Children will be entitled to compensatory
or make-up services. Keeping your own data
on what didn’t work and why will help get
that compensation down the road.”
If you “know in your gut” your child is falling
behind, having that “data piece is so important,
so you can show what’s happening,” she
says. And parents don’t have to go in to IEP
meetings alone. “If parents who don’t know
how to articulate or find what data they need
to support what they’re asking, that’s where
advocates and lawyers can help.” Don’t assume
if you’re not getting something, that it can’t be
done, she says. “If it’s doable in one district, it’s
doable in another.”
LJUBAPHOTO / E+/GETTY IMAGES.

Your Team
Shawn Gardiner teaches pre-K for 3-year-olds
in an inclusion classroom. (Inclusion means
typically developing children are included
in a class with kids who have disabilities.)
Gardiner says moving to online learning
this spring was difficult for the kids in her
class. “We spend so much of [class] working
on social skills and hands-on play. Trying
to work this into the virtual format is really
challenging,” she says.

As a caregiver, enlist your child’s educa-
tional team for support, she says. Teachers
are trained to do the heavy lifting academ-
ically. “For young children, try not to worry
about scheduling time to do ‘academic work.’
Use the virtual sessions to see what your class
is working on and so your child can connect
with their peers. When offline, schedule time
for screen-free play together where you talk
to your child,” Gardiner advises.

Rosenblatt concurs that parents shouldn’t
expect to teach, but play a supporting role.

“Children with learning differences and
deficits need a lot more specialized instruc-
tion that parents simply cannot provide
and should not be expected to provide,”
Rosenblatt says. “I strongly urge schools and
parents to add services and supports into the
distance-learning plans to address caregiver
training and support. If caregivers cannot
be available to help with the instruction, the
school needs to address this in the distance
learning plans.”
McLaughlin says, “As much as possible,
parents should familiarize themselves with
the technology tools that the school will be
using. If you need training on how to use the
technology, ask for that through the special
educator or the IEP process.”
More than anything, speak up if you need
help. “Communication is key,” McLaughlin
says. “Let the special educators know what is
working for your child and what isn’t working.

The special educator should be able to look at
the individual learning characteristics of your
child to recommend supports that can help.

Even if they don’t know what the answer is,
raise the question.”
Teachers want parents to approach them
with questions and concerns, Gardiner says.

She encourages parents to speak out and ask
everything. “Don’t hold back. I feel like some
issues took longer to fix because parents didn’t
want to trouble me by asking when they came
up,” she says. “Ask as soon as you have an
issue! It’s my job.”
Gardiner acknowledges her parents’
pain, saying, “This is hard. I’m a teacher and
mother of a 4-year-old, and I’m still figuring
out what works. Teachers are so willing to be
flexible, and we understand how stressful the
situation is. We can work with you as long as
you let us know what you need.” n
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