5 Tips for a Peaceful
Stepfamily Holiday
However, I learned some valuable lessons on negotiating with
TEXT Gayla Grace
T others and compromising on details that didn’t have to go my way.

I also resolved to take proactive steps in the future to help relieve
he holidays descended upon us quickly after my husband
some of the turmoil and division that occurred among family
and I married mid-October and began our new life together.

members. Here are a few suggestions to enable your family to
My expectations of a joyous holiday season faded as the
enjoy one another and create lasting memories, instead of simply
reality of combining two households with different traditions and
outside family members settled in.

surviving another holiday season.

Set aside unrealistic expectations. Accept that there will be
I wasn’t prepared for the chaos and heartache that accompanied
unhappy moments. Children experience fluctuating emotions as
our first set of holidays together. Blending four young children,
they cope with the loss of their traditional family and accept their
managing a harried schedule with two ex-spouses and competing
new stepfamily. They may act out or withdraw during periods of
with the “other households” for time together and adequate
grief. My stepchildren lost their mother to cancer after my husband
gift exchanges ignited a simmering blaze that burned throughout
and I had been married nine years, and holidays became especially
the season, leaving behind a trail of hurt feelings and
difficult for them. Memories of past holidays sometimes prevented
unmet expectations.

them from enjoying our family celebrations. However, I learned
10 December 2016 washingtonFAMILY.com