Ellie Mitchell, the executive director of
the Maryland Out of School Time Network,
says that after-school programs allow kids to
interact with each other more casually than
they are able to in school. “There is more
space and time in after-school for kids to
be kids together,” Mitchell says. “Free play,
imagination and creativity goes on in those
spaces that structured time in the school day
doesn’t often allow for.”
Due to the relative freedom of after-school
programs, they are often environments where
kids discover their passions.

“People frequently say in their reflections
on their own after-school experience that
that is where they found the thing they fell
in love with,” Mitchell says. “Often they are
introduced to the passion in an informal
learning setting rather than the formal,
because you have that freedom to explore it
in a way that has less pressure attached to it.”
To find out what they like, kids should be
introduced to a variety of activities. In the
early years, Mitchell recommends parents
choose a variety of programs for their
children, but eventually young people can
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pursue what they’re interested in.

Dr. Kaushal Amatya, pediatric psychologist
for the divisions of nephrology and cardiology
at Children’s National Hospital and professor
of pediatrics and psychiatry at the George
Washington University School of Medicine,
says it is important to encourage kids to focus
on what they’re good at. But that shouldn’t be
the only factor.

“Parents should try to understand what
they see as some skills that the children are
developing,” Amatya says, “and try to harness
those by getting the children more involved



“There is more space and
time in after-school for
kids to be kids together.”
P. 16-17; IRINA CHEREMISINOVA / ISTOCK / GETTY IMAGES PLUS
ELLIE MITCHELL
in the things that they seem to be naturally
gravitating toward.” However, he adds, “after-
school activities don’t always have to be
something that they’re good at, or something
that they need to excel in — in fact, it shouldn’t
always be like that.”
Jessica Boro, a parent of three who lives in
Potomac, Maryland, believes it’s important for
her kids try out a variety of activities, even those
that they don’t show a natural flair for right off
the bat. But she also recognizes the challenges
this can bring. Her 7-year-old daughter, for
example, is sometimes discouraged when her
soccer team loses, and gets turned off by the
competitive aspects of sports.

“There is some stress that comes with
it,” Boro says.

In order to relieve some of this stress,
Amatya recommends paying close attention
to how you schedule these activities. While he
recognizes that it can be difficult to coordinate
schedules for kids enrolled in after-school
programs most afternoons because their
parents work or have other commitments,
ideally competitive activities should be limited
to once or twice a week.

“If it’s something that the children are
expected to excel in or compete in,” he says,
“daily or even a few times a week might be
a little too much, especially for elementary
school kids.”
To preserve their “family sanity,” Boro and
her husband decided to have each of their
children participate in one
activity per season. With three
kids, this helps them balance everyone’s
schedules and still have quality time to spend
together as a family.

But how you schedule the kids’ after-
school activities isn’t just important for
them: Parents also need to minimize their
own commitments and stress for the sake of
the whole family, according to Dr. Consuelo
Cagande, division chief of the Community
Care and Wellness Program at Children’s
Hospital of Philadelphia.

“I strongly feel that the best way children
can manage many demands is learning from
their parents or adults,” she says. “Parents
need to be self-aware of their own over-
commitment and model good self-care. It’s
OK to not do everything just because another
child is doing it.”
While there can be stresses associated with
her kids’ after-school activities, ultimately
Boro is grateful for the unique social
opportunities they grant. For one, being on
the soccer team has allowed her daughter
to make friends with kids who aren’t in her
class at school and who she wouldn’t have
met otherwise.

“I like the community aspect of it for them,”
Boro says. “That’s the good part of any of the
after-school programs: They are a way for kids
to do an activity that’s structured, but also be
able to be kids.” T
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