W
HOW TO
HELP YOUR
CHILDREN THRIVE
IN A RAPIDLY
CHANGING, STRESSFUL
WORLD hen psychologist Dr. Madeline
Levine’s latest book “Ready or Not:
Preparing Our Kids to Thrive in
an Uncertain and Rapidly Changing World”
(Harper, 2020) published at the end of
February 2020, unbeknownst to her, the book’s
material was about to get even more relevant.

Levine, a New York Times bestselling
author, has more than 35 years of experience
as a clinician, consultant, educator and writer.

“Ready or Not,” Levine’s third book, offers
parents ways to best prepare children for the
volatile world they will enter as adults.

We spoke with Levine about her book, her
advice and the ways in which our current
educational and parental systems can do
I think that the impetus for writing “Ready
more to help our children thrive in a rapidly or Not” was (that) I had written two previous
changing, stressful environment.

books on the same topic over a period of 15
years, and I traveled this entire country, as did
Editor’s Note: The following interview has been many of my colleagues, with the exact same
condensed for space and edited for clarity. message: Kids need to play. Have rates (of
anxiety) gone down? No!
For “Ready or Not,” I didn’t talk particularly
In “Ready or Not,” you write that
to psychologists or educators. I talked to
you believe parental anxiety and the
business heads (among others)—people who
pressure-filled parenting style that
has come about as a result of upheaval live in uncertainty—thinking that maybe they
had more practice than we did.

politically, socially, etc.—that pushes
Every parent says, “I want my kids to be
children to excel—is epidemic. Why
happy.” But the message in “how’d you do in
do you believe this phenomenon is so
school?” “how are your SATs?” “where are
prominent at the moment?
Madeline Levine (ML): Well, I’m not sure you going to college?” is that this is the most
that I think the same kind of pressure that important thing you can do: be a straight-A
parents had before the pandemic is exactly student, get into a great college, and then from
there, you’ll go to Google or LinkedIn. But what
what it’s like now.

I think, in a nutshell, parents are rightfully was stunning about the research is that I went
anxious about their children’s prospects in a to all those places, and they were unanimous
world that they don’t understand. And now, it’s in saying, “No, that’s not what we’re looking
for anymore.”
a world that nobody understands.

When you were talking to leaders
inside and outside of psychology, what
emerged as the most important skills
for kids to have as they prepare to face
the years ahead?
Perseverance, flexibility, collaboration, curiosity,
creativity and self-regulation. (There is also)
educated risk taking—being open to seeing
things differently. I’m not pushing risk taking like
running out on the street, but that willingness
to try something new, to see something in a
different way, that comes up a lot also.

Where are we failing our kids? What
exactly are we doing that’s causing
our kids to fall short in this rapidly
changing world?
I think it goes back to this notion of success.

(Pre-pandemic,) every time I gave a talk, I
had two slides. (The first was a) straight line—
that’s the trajectory of “you know what you
want to do. You get the grades. You go to a
great school … do that work, and you’re happy
ever after.” And no matter where in the world
I presented that slide, the number of people
who took that direct route is between 1% and
10%. That leaves 90%-99% of people who took
a jagged—or squiggly—path.

As a parent, you’ve got to open up your
notion about what it means to be successful in
the world. My practice is made up of “highly
‘Ready or
BY MEGAN CONWAY
DR. MADELINE LEVINE
14 Washington FAMILY APRIL 2022
PARENTING