thu
sat wed
focusing on a child’s wardrobe preferences.

“If a parent comes to me and says, ‘My
kid dresses the same way. How worried
should I be?’ I don’t ask a whole lot of
questions about their clothing choices,”
explains Shapiro, creator of Parent Child
Journey, a parent training and support
program. “The bigger issue for me is: Do
they have the friendships that they want
to have? How do they feel about them-
selves? Is the clothing issue part of a larger
package or not?”
Shapiro often works with children on
the autism spectrum, and while dress-
ing in the same clothing every day can
be a sign of the disorder, there are other
indicators as well. However, in typi-
cally developing kids, wearing the same
clothing repeatedly is fine, he says.

After my daughter told me what her
best friend said to her, I reminded her that
it doesn’t matter what a person wears—it
matters how they treat others. She agreed
but I knew it still bothered her.

Soon after, there was a sale at a depart-
ment store. My daughter and I looked
through their online selection together
and she picked out a few new outfits. After
wearing them a handful of times, she grav-
itated back to her old favorites, and quite
frankly, I am OK with that. They’re always
clean when she wears them, and they
really do represent her.

That friend hasn’t brought up my
daughter’s t-shirt choices again but
recently started asking why she wears
the same jacket all the time. (Who
knew you needed multiple jackets
now?) Thankfully, my daughter doesn’t
seem as bothered by the comments this
time. She likes herself, and that is what
truly matters. ■
fri tips from parents
WHO’VE BEEN THERE
“If we’re going out to a nice
dinner or it’s freezing, I start
the conversation early with my
8-year-old son, and we discuss
options. He’s generally compliant.

I also allow him to change out
of said ‘uncomfortable’ clothes
immediately.” “I buy multiples of the
same thing and do
laundry frequently.”
—DEBRAH, POTOMAC, MD
—JENNI, BETHESDA, MD
“My daughter is 14
now and wears soccer
clothes 24/7. I tried
fighting it but then
realized I have a great
kid. She is kind, a great
student, loves to help
others and just an
awesome human being.

I had to let go of my
own opinions.”
—JULIE, HAYMARKET, VA
“My kindergarten son refused to
wear anything with buttons for an
entire winter. Finally I asked him
to think of the top three reasons
why he hated buttons so much.

Once he was put on the spot to
pinpoint exactly why he hated
buttons, he began to realize how
silly it would be to spend his
whole life hating buttons.”
—MARISA, WASHINGTON, DC
“My 3-year-old is into unicorns and has one dress that
she wants to wear every day. If it’s not stained, I’ll put
it in the dryer for a few minutes to freshen it so she
can wear it the next day, but if it’s visibly filthy, I’ve had
some luck showing her the stains and explaining that
she’ll get to wear it again when I can wash it.”
—SIMONE, WASHINGTON, DC
“I let them wear what they want
(leggings and sweatpants), and
we all move on with our lives.

#aintnobodygottimeforthat” —KAREN, WASHINGTON, DC
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